Feast of the Transfiguration

The Dark Church, Goreme, Cappadocia, Turkey

Well, our  feasting began last night at Vespers. Beautiful antiphons, tones for the Psalms and the readings are always some of my favourites anyway, so that's not really fair. Well, the whole Feast is basically my favorite, too. And basically all the antiphons are from Scripture as well.

Christ Jesus, the brightness of the Father and the express image of his being, who upholds all things by the word of his power, while at the same time purging away our sins, deigned on this day to show himself in glory upon a high mountain. (Antiphon on the Magnificat)

I love this hymn we sang, the first stanza of which is in the photo above:

Caelestis formam gloriae

O wondrous type! O vision fair

of glory that the Church may share,

which Christ upon the mountain shows,

where brighter than the sun he glows!

With Moses and Elijah nigh

Th' incarnate Lord holds converse high;

And from the cloud, the Holy One

Bears witness to the only Son.

With shining face and bright array,

Christ deigns to manifest today

what glory shall be theirs above

who joy in God with perfect love.

And faithful hearts are raised on high

by this great vision's mystery;

for which in joyful strains we raise

the voice of prayer, the hymns of praise.

O Father, with the eternal Son,

and Holy Spirit, ever One,

vouchsafe to bring us by thy grace

to see thy glory face to face.

Our homilist made mention of Hiroshima also occurring on this day, which seems such a horrendous thing to me that it would happen simultaneously with this Feast. I pray that God would forgive us, things known and unknown, that disfigure His glory in any of His creatures, whom with one degree to another, He is changing into His likeness. Forgive us, Father; we don't know what we do. Enfold your kingdom of peace and beauty on the earth.

Collect for the Day

O God, who on the holy mount revealed to chosen witnesses your well-beloved Son, wonderfully transfigured, in raiment white and glistening: mercifully grant that we, being delivered from the disquietude of this world, may by faith behold the King in his beauty; who with you, O Father, and you, O Holy Spirit, lives and reigns, one God for ever and ever. Amen.

Love, the Star, is on the Way

Orion Nebula Star Formation Factory

Creator of the stars of night,

Thy people’s everlasting light,

Jesu, Redeemer, save us all,

And hear Thy servants when they call.

Thou, grieving that the ancient curse

Should doom to death a universe,

Hast found the medicine, full of grace,

To save and heal a ruined race.

~Creator of the stars of night, 1982 Hymnal #60

star factory nearby galaxy

Stars, keep the watch. When night is dim

One more light the bowl shall brim,

Shining beyond the frosty weather,

Bright as sun and moon together.

People, look east and sing today:

Love, the star, is on the way.

~People look east, Eleanor Farjeon 

 
Today, I had the joy of singing the preceding hymns (can be heard by clicking below) as part of our Advent choir during our Wednesday Eucharist service in chapel.  Afterward, our esteemed dean and president even said to me, "You looked like you were enjoying yourself up there, very full of joy."  So, perhaps Advent is doing its work after all, eh?  The service was lovely and God was faithful, as always, to use the music and the liturgy to bring joy and assurance that He is indeed coming.  A word was given during the service that the Lord was encouraging a female in the room with a hole in her heart that He was healing it and that He does not mean for her to carry it going forward.  I am one such girl (with a black hole in her heart) who could use that encouragement as just last week I was telling a friend, "I have so little hope that this one thing will be healed before I get to the new heavens and new earth...."  And that healing is what the Lord has been trying to remind me of over the last month or so.

This may seem somewhat roundabout, but it's the meditation that I sat down to write so here it is.  I have been thinking a lot about the whole of creation groaning for completion, for us to take our place as the children, kings and queens of God, for all to be put to rights, for the Prince of Shalom to reign fully.  Lately, I have also groaned for this and I am glad for the season of Advent, in part, for a time to lament and groan together for the brokenness that is still here and yet for the abundant life and the medicine, as the hymn says, that has been given in the Incarnation of our Lord who is faithful to heal and bring us all, as one creation, to completion.  

surroundings of a black hole

But, what I want to add is that while I was viewing Hubble photos for today's images of stars, I realized that I really do view a place in myself as a black hole, so compact and dense that all is lost into it...even light, its gravitational pull all-encompassing.  Whatever star was present, died and had been of such a mass that a black hole is all that is left.  This is a very difficult truth for me to share but even so, God has asked me to share as honestly as I am able and this image really settled in my mind today as being how I view this, not with God's lens, but just with my own.  This is in some ways, a really helpful image because I know even with all this gloom (the paradox of the already and not yet, methinks) that God, Creator of the stars of night, Love, the bright morning star who himself is the nuclear fuel of every star and will never die, is on the way and the darkness has not overcome him!  I'm praying this becomes more evident as Advent goes on and that it takes hold in the midst of the black hole I have carried so long in my heart.  This is also part of why I am determined to present these meditations, to remind myself of Light and Beauty.

"I, Jesus, have sent my angel to give you this testimony for the churches. I am the Root and the Offspring of David, and the bright Morning Star."   (Revelation 22.16)

"Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made.  In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind.  The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness HAS NOT overcome it."  (John 1.3-5)

Art thou He?

I look from afar, and lo, I see the power of God coming, and a cloud covering the whole earth.  Go ye out to meet him, and say,

"Tell us, art thou he that should come to reign over thy people Israel?"

High and low, rich and poor, one with another, Go ye out to meet him, and say, "Hear, O thou shepherd of Israel, thou that leadest Joseph like a sheep, Tell us, art thou he that should come?"

Stir up thy strength, O Lord, and come to reign over thy people Israel.

Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Ghost.

I look from afar, and lo, I see the power of God coming, and a cloud covering the whole earth.  Go ye out to meet him, and say, 

"Tell us, art thou he that should come to reign over thy people Israel?"

~Palestrina Matin Responsory for Advent

the summit

I'm ba-ack! Sorry for the very long hiatus from blogging. So busy lately.

Last Monday: pick up brother at airport at 8:30 pm, drive to San Antonio whilst listening to John Stossel and Harry Potter & The Half-Blood Prince and pseudo-sleeping off and on.

Tuesday: arrive 3 hours ahead of schedule at 3 pm in San Anton. slept until 6 pm or so...then bummed around.

As of Wednesday, it was Go Time as we like to call it. Got the 15 passenger van which I mostly drove all weekend-awesome. Everyone came in from the airport, lots of screaming and shrillness.
Can't remember the rest to be honest. Shopped for a corset to go under the bridesmaid dress-they are way harder to find than you think! I mean seriously, the only place I could find them was a bridal store...ridiculous.
Barbecue to introduce to the fams. That meant that I mostly found things to do in the kitchen and serve people food, etc. Yes!

Thursday: my sanity arrives in San Anton at 11 am...Sanity is also known as Greg. And so do the rest of the masses, we shop even more for a corset-yes, I did drag him along. Then we hunted and hunted and hunted some more...for handmade paper for the program cover. Oh yes, 2 days before the wedding, we were hunting for the program paper. Then rehearsal and rehearsal dinner...not too much excitement there. It was on the river which was fun and then we walked on it after dinner. Much confusion over toasting and proper etiquette. Mom and her Emily Post whatnot say rehearsal dinner but everyone there assumed reception. Now, I loathe public speaking and the gastrointestinal spasms that accompany it and I also felt all this pressure (from myself, no doubt) to make it the best one ever in the history of the world. So much worrying but Joe's dad toasted a little and a couple others also and that was...interesting, to say the least. Joe's dad's kind of like Mike Ditka and funny once he's had a little to drink. Our common point for the weekend was "The Billy Graham Center"; every time he saw me he'd ask me about how much I liked it. EVERY time...

Friday: Tubing on the river!!!! So fun. No pictures. Sorry.
Got back 2 hours later than we thought we would...but we got barbecue from Rudy's so totally worth it :)

Bachelorette party! We totally partied like it was 1999...except more like 2004 or so...anywho, it was a good time had by all. I wrote all the bridesmaids and asked them to give me some songs that remind them of Hope or Hope and Joe and I compilated...or compiled rather them into a CD. It's pretty good...odd, but good. Black Eyed Peas, Jack Johnson, Robert Palmer, Celine Dion, Alison Krauss, Dave Barnes- they all made it onto the CD. I made frozen Strawberry Margaritas (they were way girly!) and we ate fajitas and a version of brownie pizza formerly unheard of by the girls. Then, off to bed before the big, ridiculously huge, life-changing day!

Or so we thought...Hope and I were up really late discussing the ins and outs of family and weddings and disappointments and fears; she had a really good cry, I cried a little bit and then to sleep at somewhere around 2:30 in the morning...Is that how the night before your wedding s supposed to go? Oh well, we decided that we'd start planning my wedding now and then that would at least help SOME of the stress be less...but hey, it's nerve racking to come to the day that will alter the rest of your life. Weird.

WEDDING DAY: wake up early but not early enough...oops! what can we say? anyhow, T-2 hours to get Hope and Joe's slideshow done. But hey, we did it...cuties. But, please take note: do not plan a picnic on your wedding day. It was a really nice gesture to out of towners and extended family but it just didn't work! My sister, her fiance, my brother, Greg and I ended up sitting together. It was fun, but sort of nerve-racking because we didn't really see anyone else just hung out in a clump. My brother and I are kind of like that, the 2 minorities in the corner :)

So, then, crunch time, I ran around to find a guest book, oh yes, little things left undone, then had to make it by 2:30 for the hair appointment. As it turns out, all 8 bridesmaids plus my mom ended up going so that makes for a lot of opinions and cuteness. But, alas, they had already done their hair and make-up so that was tricky. I missed a lot of Hope getting ready and getting ready with everyone. Kinda sad but oh well...there's always next...oh, wait a minute, no there won't be! But, I'm not bitter...;)

Pics before wedding=good idea. Ceremony beautiful, read from Song of Solomon, reception-open half bar, sitting at rectangular table for bridal party with bride and groom sitting as the heads of the table=bad idea. A good time had by all, dancing with my brother and my baby, catchin' up with old Albuquerque friends who I haven't seen in years = priceless. Seeing them drive away in the Model A=relief. Realizing Hope's purse was in the trunk of her friend's car=ugh. Taking to her in church parking lot and giving a big hug and checkin' out smile=worth it all!

Pictures on Picasa soon!
AND THEY ALL LIVED HAPPILY (albeit sleepily) EVER AFTER

sunny day

these sunny days

colorful arrays
trees blow with hues and grays
it pays to be one who submits and [lifts up]
into the heart of [father] i gaze
these sunny days

i thought id take a minute i hope i didnt catch you by surprise
i got a lesson learner fact or fiction swoop through your demise
open eyes and givin clear vision the windows broken from
the pain of livin here wishin
you could survive with those who gave lives
avoid the cracks and moats of new age turncoats
and modern day cut throats
what makes it shroom blossom and boom
a murmer in a gossipin room
my [j.....] comin back possibly soon
anticipate his shown up desire for grown up
the author and finisher of faith
offerin a diminishing gas face
rememberin who in last place
no sell out through global fall out go all out
make a hundred your percentage forget buyin the mall out
or palm greases thirty pieces sent to those offended
but like judas you wont ever get to spend it

well lemme get a little lotta bita some of that too
and i hope it aint too non ghetto to seep through
and keep you twisted and locked like dreads do
who said you wasnt gonna feel the heat of the rays
but anyways man its funny
how the sight of such a beautiful day
can deliver you joy and bring pain in the same way
like blessing with the same mouth
while cursing in the same breate
or living life dying death
so deceived to the eye
how red blood is blue
and rainbows are see through
its all to teach you that you cant depend on me
like drivin a benz 20 inch rims
drop top 6 with the tank on e
so down that you fly
so true that you gotta lie
i really pray you come to realize
you in the shade with the sun in your eye
sun in your eye on sunny days-acapo

~"sunny days" by Grits